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They Make it Look So Easy

WELL BEING, MEDIA
Gabrielle Vaughn | Blogger Du Jour


Over the years, I’ve come to appreciate self-discipline as an invisible magic. You can’t see, taste, or smell it, but its effects are unmistakable. It can transform overweight into slim, uninformed into expert, poor into rich, and misery into happiness. It’s the submerged part of the iceberg others don’t see when they see a person’s “genius.”

For example, celebrities have never been more visible in our culture. Famous athletes, talented actors and actresses, and incredible musicians are all over the media. But what we don’t see are the thousands of hours of super-focused work these people have put in behind the scenes to get to where they are.

It’s easy to feel that success comes easily – that it’s just a matter of luck, or an innate gift. But anyone who has achieved anything has done so because they’ve been able to control and direct their own inner strengths and actions to the extent that has enabled them to become super-skilled at what they do. And this kind of self-discipline, like a muscle, can be developed by all of us, including you.

– Marc Chernoff “Secret Tricks of Highly Productive, Self-Disciplined People”

The photo depicts Gloria Steinem and Dorothy Pitman-Hughes, both stellar examples of self-discipline, both leaders in women’s rights.

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It’s Egg-Freezing Time

HEALTH, PREGNANCY
Evan Chen | Contributor


Egg freezing. As they say these days, “It’s a thing now.”

If you’ve been awake over the last few days and you’ve managed to hear above the words, ebola and Isis, then you may have heard the news that Facebook and Apple are now willing to pay for the freezing of their female employees ovum. According to The Guardian, the new trend is apparently very exciting news for women younger than age 40. Read more

Is It Pinktober Yet?

HEALTH
Gabrielle Vaughn | Blogger du Jour


Well, we’ve hit October – time to do things in pink. Wait, what are we celebrating again?

Oh yeah. Breast cancer awareness month. Not a celebration, though you sure would think so with all the happy pink bubbles. You know what pink made me aware of? That pink exists but a cure does not. Pink let me know that money exists – but still, the cure eludes us.

It’s Pinktober again — and you know what that means? It means that we the people get to celebrate the sisterhood of the traveling cancer, with pretty pink parades and pinky-pink ribbons. Let’s march through the streets, hand in hand O My Sisters, ’cause fighting cancer is a pretty pink bonding experience. Yippy, skippy! Read more

Kill the Bitch (It’s a Tired Word)

AESTHETICS, MENOPAUSE
Adrian Lamb | Blogger Extraordinaire


The other day, I overheard a 9-year old girl describe her own mood as “bitchy.” She had said that she believed she might be getting her period because she confessed that she’d been “acting like such a bitch these days.”

Hormones aside, I thought that was quite an inappropriate word for such a young girl to use, especially as a descriptive for her own self. I’m no prude, nor do I think the word, “Bitch” is all that horrid – I simply wondered how a child her age came to feel comfortable with a word that was generally used in the context of slang.

Of course, children have access to a wide vocabulary of inappropriate words — think how many they must overhear on TV alone. But rarely does a child actually know how to apply these words, unless specifically instructed. Where was she getting her information? And what made this young girl equate menstruation with the word, “bitchy?” Read more

Wife Beaters: Throw the Bum Out

Wife beaters. Again.

Are we really having the conversation where we have to take men to task for being wife beaters? Is this real? We’ve got the evening news playing us footage of the woman-bashing football player who cold-cocked his wife and now suddenly we’re acting like this might possibly be an issue — as if it’s never not been an issue before. Read more

9.11 – Every Second of Life is Precious

Every second of life is precious.

2001 was quite a year for me. I was diagnosed with breast cancer and told that not only would a radical mastectomy be imperative to my survival, but also that I would have to begin a year’s worth of aggressive chemotherapy, followed by 35 rounds of radiation. I had the life-changing operation in July, and on September 6, I began the first of my many therapeutic and highly toxic infusions.

The chemo hit quick. It was an instantaneous slap in the face that would not stop slapping until it rendered me hopelessly immobile in both body and mind. My only thoughts: “Just one more year of this, that’s all. Just one more year. Hang on, Gabrielle, hang on.” Read more

Can We Tawk About Joan Rivers?

Can we tawk?

Yes, we certainly can. Sadly, we can no longer ‘tawk’ with the New Yawker who coined the phrase – Joan Rivers. Joan died last week at 81 years old after undergoing a routine procedure that – as they say – went terribly wrong. And while we cannot claim she died too young, we also know that before this event, she was healthy and full of joie-de-vivre. She had a lot to live for – and she wanted to live. The endoscopy that she went in for resulted in her going into cardiac arrest. She was shortly after put into a medically induced coma, from which she never came out of.

Poor Joan. What a spirit she was. What a game changer. We often throw around those key words – pioneer, game changer, fearless… It wasn’t as if the mention of her name automatically registered as noble to all or any who heard it, in fact, most people found her obnoxious and ridiculous. Her brand of comedy was not only hilarious, it was a vehicle that we all used to laugh at everything we take so seriously.

Her quote: “Life goes by fast. Enjoy it. Calm down. It’s all funny.” Read more

The Sweet Speech Dare

Earlier today, I was taken aback at how the commentary on one particular article in a woman’s magazine ran from one end of the spectrum to the other – the subject was basically about the female body in advertising, and the mixed messages were so over the top that by the time I was finished with the page, I was thoroughly confused as to what anyone was trying to say. Naturally, the one to take the worst of it was the poor woman who posed for the feature.

On one hand, the article was trying to show how women’s bodies are all different and that we should embrace the difference – yet each and every difference was pointed out and ridiculed, no matter what body part was being talked about or shown. Read more

Warning: Harlot in the House!

In the same way that a vampire who shuns the cross has to believe in the powers the cross supposedly represents, so must the woman who is called a whore believe that this particularly ignorant and antiquated word has mystical powers – if she is to care at all if she is called one.

Slut shaming. It’s been going on since the beginning of time. What is it about ‘whore’ that makes it the go-to word when someone wants to sexually belittle a woman? To call a woman, ‘whore’ is truly all about the power we give words, because sincerely – could any woman on earth possibly feel the sting this dumb-ass word is intended to deliver?

“She’s a whore!” What next? “Fie! A loathsome snake she is, the trollop!” Oh please. And yet, calling a woman a whore is always somebody’s best shot. Read more